Inkwell: Authors and Artists

    
Len- Wow! I was just looking for a good version of Arabian Nights as
well. I've been reading the Lang version...couldn't quite get through
the Burton one. I'll have to check out the Madrus and Mathers version.
NOw, does anyone know when and where the three wishes thing got
incorporated into the story? Just wondering.

Neil- By not wanting to put Crazy Hair into public domain, that means
that you're going to publish it someday soon, right?
  

    
a tad long, but I'm feeling wordy today.

Arabian Nights - this is very odd.  Early this morning I was wandering
around campus wondering what I was going to do for the next couple of
hours and I decided to go to the library.  I wandered around for a bit,
and finally decided I should get some Joseph Campbell but he was
pretty much all checked out.  So I decided to get a copy of the Arabian
Nights instead.  When I got back there I saw the Burton edition which
I've been meaning to read for about a year but for some reason or
another decided to pick up a thinner book instead.  Volume one of the
Mardrus and Mathers.  Walking down the stairs the thought popped into
my head "Someone is going to mention this on the Well now".  And lo and
behold...  I didn't get a chance to start reading it yet though.  I
ended up playing People Pinball all day.  "Oh hi!"  chatchitchat.  "Hey
it's you!"  chitchatchit.  And so on and so forth.  

Angelina - I have it on good authority that Mr. Neil here gets his
extra hours from a dusty little shop in Morocco.  However, as Morocco
might be a little out of your way, I suggest waiting until the next
time he comes back from one of his little trips.  Upon return he must
sleep for 3 days straight before being able to use the newly acquired
hours.  So, what you should do is wait until the 2nd day when he is
well and truly deeply asleep.  Send the first person you meet on the
road into his house.  They will immediately be set on and killed by 3
inch long venomous snakes.  Send the second person you meet on the road
into the house, past the dead body and into the basement.  They will
see the chest where he keeps his hours, but when they open it, they
will be decapitated by an ingenious device given to Neil at one of his
earlier signing tours by a man wearing a fur hat.  You must then send
in a third and final person to go into the house, past the 1st dead
body, past the 2nd dead body, and past the head.  They can then
retrieve the hours and bring them out to you where they will promptly
drop dead from several poisoned arrows received in the back.  Use the
hours at your convenience.

Jessica - Very cool poem, I think you spoke for a lot of us.  :-)  I
love your pages, they're very pretty.

Dan - I think Mr. Neil here is a muse in disguise.  I write most of my
stuff, and my best stuff I think, after reading something of his or
going to a reading.  It helps to chase away those pesky doubts.

I am now picturing doubts as pesky little round creatures that scurry
about covered in dust.  

Jen, Out I say, Out!  Squish, stamp and stomp all doubts!
  

    

That's ok, I misread it as "chase away those pesky doughnuts."
Just for a moment, but it was good for a laugh.

I'm going to go eat something now.

"Here, doughnut..."
  

    
Madman - heh heh.  Of course, now I have Homer Simpson on the brain.

"mmmmm... forbidden doughnut..."
"Doughnuts... is there anything they can't do?"

Jen, Simpsons freak.
  

    
Jessica-- beautiful poem.  Jen's right-- you speak for many of us.
(and I was at the NY reading, so I know.)

Jen-- you may be right about Jessica's poem, but you're wrong about
where Neil gets his extra hours. You have, I know, heard of "Ma
Zbrewski's Bathtub Gin," made famous in an early raid of Eliot Ness's. 
And doubtless, you've wondered who Ma Zbrewski is, since the photos of
the Ness raid show only her daughter, Clair, handcuffed to an illegal
still (I'm told that this wasn't an uncommon position for Clair, but
that's another story.)  Anyway, the point I'm making is that Ma
Zbrewski discovered that when you up the juniper and reduce the lemon
balm in your hooch, the distilling process actually causes the alcohol
to precipitate _time_, which speeds up the fermentation process and
produces a mellower booze.  Ma quickly learned to scrape the time from
the sides of the still, where it gathered in an opalescent resin, and
she saved it in Ball canning jars, using only a bit at a time to keep
herself young (you have, of course, realized at this point, that Ma
_was_ Clair Zbrewski.)

So anyway, in researching the Zbrewski line for American Gods, Neil
found the original still, and, scraping a bit of the heady resin, soon
discovered himself living 27-hour days, which were ultimately still
(pardon the pun) too short, but Neil knew about Ma Zbrewski's terrible
end (frankly,I never knew they made ski-lifts that small,) and wisely
chose not to partake too deeply.  I haven't asked Neil where the still
is-- I don't have the guts.  But maybe Angelina will.

Neil-- and everybody else-- thanks for the Arabian Nights info... will
seek it out tomorrow.
  

    
Jo -- no-one's asking me to go to Australia or New Zealand right now
-- trouble is I've now G of H'd at the national cons of each country
within the last 5 years.

Angelina-- right now I would kill for extra hours in the day. And
extra months in the year.

Jessica -- well, my response to the photo was 'my GOD I look tired'
too. & that's a lovely poem -- I'm honoured to have been involved in
its conception. (I suppose this is how the grecian urn must have felt.)

Blythe -- Gods and Tulips. 

Dan -- The point is less "oh my god, could someone else right this?"
and more, "don't try and write like everyone else, don't try to tell
the same stories as everyone else. Tell your stories.".

Erynn -- which three wishes in which story? And yes, I think so.

Jen -- I just buy time in bulk.

.,..

Racing a galloping deadline, writing a film script. The story is like
trying to pick up smoke, possibly because I don't know who I'm writing
it for right now: me, the movie, or the studio execs.

Ah well. Teabreak's over. back on my head.
  

    
Len - LOL  ::claps::

Neil - so what kind of deals does one get buying in bulk?

Jen.
  

    
Well, you know...somewhere along the line The Genie began to grant
three wishes In various Aladdin stories. Not the early ones I know, but
there were the Fairy Tale theater and Oh geez--I just checked my post,
I guess I didn't say which story! Sometimes I forget that I'm not
telepathic. I've been particularly obsessed with Aladdin and his
Wonderful Lamp..(researching for a story.)Oops.

 Yes, Neil is very inspiring...sometimes almost too much so. I can't
read too much of his stuff in a row or else bad things start happening
to my stories...bad as in too much like his, only not as good. Luckily
I catch it and luckily the publishers don't let him relase too much
stuff at once or I'd be in trouble. On the other hand, I can't wait to
read everything that's coming. Neil, you're too hard to resist. 
  

    
Erynn -- how odd - I don't remember any version of Aladdin with three
wishes in it. Just that the slave of the lamp could do big important
magics, while the slave of the ring was much less powerful.

There's the fisherman and the genie of course, but there the genie
decides what the three gifts he shall give will be, and by the time the
fisherman lets him out, the gift is death.

Don't recall any occasions of 3 wishes in the Nights, although it's a
big book, and it contains many stories.
  

    
BTW, if I remember correctly there is a small amount of controversy
about Aladdin possibly not being of arabian origin but actually
originating in france. 

I cannot, incidentally recommend highly enough Robert Irwin's
wonderful Arabian Nights Companion. And I'm a big fan of his novel, the
Arabian Nightmare.
  

    
Aha! Here's the Kirkus review of the Irwin book...

....

From Kirkus Reviews , June 15, 1994
Matching The Arabian Nights' scope and enchantment with erudition and
wit, Irwin (The Arabian Nightmare, 1987) explores its elusive kingdom
of stories, delving into the vast work's textual genesis, cultural
history, and literary legacy. The most influential book in the Western
canon that does not actually belong to it, The Arabian Nights never
enjoyed the same literary status in the East, and its origins have been
made only murkier by its reception in Europe. Irwin begins with the
translators who popularized the Nights and, along the way, bowdlerized
and warped it, or even inserted their own episodes. Most famously,
Aladdin, who has no Arabic version predating his appearance in
18th-century France, may well have been the creation of translator
Antoine Galland, not of Scheherazade. Irwin wryly glosses these early
translations, which distortedly mirror the original Eastern exoticism
with the reflections of their age's prejudices and their translators'
personal eccentricities (notably the lexical, racial, and sexual
obsessions of the Victorian adventurer Sir Richard Burton). The earlier
Arabic compilations are no more reliable, however--Irwin devotes a
separate chapter to forerunners (conjectural or lost) over several
centuries, from India to Persia and Egypt. In a quixotic effort to
amass 1,001 actual tales, these medieval compilers would incorporate
local legends and real settings, sometimes approaching souk
storytellers as sources. Throughout, Irwin's scholarly acumen
illuminates these myriad worlds of the Nights, whether the cityscapes
of the Mamelukes, the urban rogues' gallery of thieves and bazaar
magicians, or the marvels of jinn and clockwork birds. The longest
chapter is a selected roster of its literary heirs, from nursery fables
and gothic novels through Proust, Joyce, and Borges, to contemporaries
like Salman Rushdie and John Barth. An enchanting dragoman and
chaperon for sleepless nights with Scheherazade. -- Copyright ©1994,
Kirkus Associates, LP. All rights reserved. --This text refers to the
Hardcover edition. 
  

    
Okay, I ordered a copy just now.  It's not in print but a half.com seller
has copies.
  

    
<stupid internet ate my post>

<grrrrrrr> <--look, I'm fierce. fear me. 

so I'm talking to Walker on the phone about my post here about Neil's
THREE bay area signings in one day and he says "What post?" and I tell
him "the one I posted about an hour ago" (this was hours ago) and he
tells me again "What post?", and so I've finally gotten around to
checking and it looks like my stupid computer or the connection or
something in between just plain got hungry and ate it and isn't this
the most awful run-on sentence you've read in ages?

So, there I was, all excited about four bay area signings, until I
noticed that THREE of them are all in one afternoon. I sincerely doubt
I'll make it to Dark Carnival, but I do have a wonderful Berkeley
suggestion for a sushi dinner between signings (it's where I'm planning
to go, at any rate). Really wishing the Booksmith signing was at
night, but since there are Aussies in here, I'll stop my griping right
now.

squeaks, who wonders if "Back To The Future" is where the term "flux
capacitor" came from, because she just saw it in a Star Trek: TNG
episode. curious. and VERY sleepy.
  

    
Although my HS library didn't have any good editions of Arabian
Nights, they did have Irwin's Companion, so I took that out... so far,
so good--it definately dispelled my impression that reading the Arabian
Nights would be a simple-- or even easily manageable-- undertaking.  

I am going to look for The Arabian Nightmare today-- one review
described it as an Eco chamber, which I found irresistable.

Michelle-- your growl terrifies me; please make a soothing happy face.
  

    
Neil-- did you use the Irwin as a reference when you wrote _Ramadan?_
  

    
Neil -- You should tell Peter Straub about this ink called Dragon's
Blood. I use it all the time when writing by hand. You can pick up a
bottle at any new agey type store -- all you need is a quill to go with
it. Nothing beats the sound of the quill scratching the page like it's
satisfying a good itch. And the color is glorious.

As for meeting celebs...I refuse to ask for photographs with the
people. It just seems too intrusive. Guess it's the vampire side of me.
Book signings are more my style because they allow you to remember the
moment more clearly. Of course the ideal situation is to enjoy a quick
20 minute meeting over coffee, but this is something I've only been
able to do once with the musician/animator/director, Voltaire, and
somehow our 20 minutes turned into five hours. I'll be meeting Harlan
Ellison this weekend at ICON, and I can't wait. Anybody else going?

I'm also giving away a free copy of American Gods, once it's
published, to the winner of the Romantic Myth contest. Details can be
found on http://www.inscriptionsmagazine.com/Myth.html
  

    
Michelle -- who's posting this stuff? I'm not doing a signing at Dark
Carnival, I'll be doing a drop-in at some point that day to sign store
stock... sigh...
  

    
Okay, I figured it out 
http://www.harpercollins.com/hc/eventSearchResults/index.asp?AuthorId=3417

has every stop on the tour (except for the ones not finalised)
including the drop-by's. These aren't signings -- they are unscheduled
drop-ins to a store to sign stock. Sometimes the store doesn't have any
stock. Once -- and only once -- a store had a time for a drop-in, so
told all their customers and there were 60 people waiting in a line
when I got there. That store went out of business several months
later...  So on this tour, stores are not being given a time for a drop
in -- they may get a day, but that's all.

I'll ask Harper COllins to take down the things from the web site that
aren't actually signings.

I'm still waiting to get the last of the confirmed signings from them,
to post the complete final list of US signings here and on
americangods.com -- that'll be the actual list of signings.

SF -- it's booksmiths at lunchtime, Cody's in the evening.

Len -- no, Irwin hadn't written or published his companion when I
wrote Ramadan. I used my memories of Mardus and Mathers and the little
bit of Burton I'd read, and the 1890s Encyclopedia Brittanica article
on Hassan.
  

    
Jade -- give Harlan my very best. Please tell him that his Leprechaun
Nun joke -- which he told me, and I told to
Gwenda-who-works-for-the-governor-of-Kentucky -- is now the Governor of
Kentucky's favourite joke.
  

    
Michelle--you really must teach me to growl like that.  Mine have been
coming out more like purrs.

Something is wrong with my keyboard...you have to hit the spacebar
pretty hard.  But its sort of fun in a way.  Until I have to write a
paper...

While we are on the subject of good book suggestions (but then again,
when are we not?) may I ask which version of/book about the Kabalah
should one start off with?  I do not doubt that Neil will have a good
suggestion, but if anyone knows of one, please let me know.

Angelina.
  

    
Oh god, not _that_ Leprechaun Nun joke.
  

    

Does it involve penguins?
  

    
Angelina-- God is a Verb, by David Cooper, is supposed to be pretty
good.  If you're looking for something academic, Gershom Scholem's
_Kabbalah_ is generally felt to be an excellent and thorough
introduction-- I find him rather dry, but he knows his stuff.
  

    
Ok, what leprechaun joke?
  

    
...and the second leprechaun doubled over laughing, "Sean, ye f------ a
penguin!"