Mark Chump, a scientist
Vera Chump, his ex-wife
Jane & Michael, their children
Grace McMuffin, a scientist
Robert Dobbs, a scientist
Peter Warbucks, their boss at Stonewall Aerospace
Sam "Snoopy" Slicker, head of security at Stonewall Aerospace
Billie Maple, A.K.A. "Heidi Salami," exotic dancer
Velma Grayle, A.K.A. "Venus Flytrap" exotic dancer
Six Pac, a pimp-wannabee
Natasha Noname, a foreign agent