Honorable Sir,
I have no clue as to why the "Welcome U.G." muse has taken over me 
and here are the latest bouquets put at your feet.

8. U.G., The Muse

1) You prefer implement sheds in farms,
Calming our minds' storms, casting your charms,
You are the best guest one can get,
Yet you are an escape artist no one can net!

2) You warn "Don't act smart, you'll get clobbered,"
Yet you held the handle while someone else labored,
Your very presence casts an aura of peace,
Difficult to describe, as you are both the chalk and the cheese!

3) All in Calamity indulged in verse,
But being U.G., your only poem was terse,
You chirped, "U.G. went up the Eggli,
Found it ugly and came down quickly."

4) How can the Everest climb any mountain,
U.G.'s only verse was a flirty fountain,
I am enjoying the bounties you chose to grant,
You are the shining sun and I am the grateful amaranth!

5) You blast every concept and notion,
And leave me with both clarity and confusion,
You raze to ground every institution,
As they are breeding grounds of imperfection!

6) U.G. says "You cannot have this and that too,"
A shattering statement, yet so true,
With society you have no problem or clash,
Is it because you flew, while most others crash?

7) U.G. is in constant public glare,
Never wavering in his moral lair,
He goes on harping on stocks and cash,
Yet distributes it with dash and panache!

Sreedhav, the Medium