America's Cup (tm) Free Press
Launch Announcement
Why "America's Cup" (tm)
is not a Legal Trademark
Music: "They Built the
oneAustralia"
America's Cup (tm) Free Press
Application for Membership
Book Review: The Lawsuit History of
the America's Cup (tm)
Music: "I am the Skipper of the Stars and
Stripes"
Lost French Keel Photographed by Opposition
Forbidden ASCII art of the America's Cup (tm)
Music: "Sail a Race on the Wild Side"
Joe's Journal #1
Music: "When I saw that water there"
Lost French keel lost again!
America's Cup (tm) Jargon Watch
Did DC's Keel Really Break?
Music: "16 Crew"
Rudder Wings: What's Going On?
Joe's Journal #2
Music: "The Ballad of Dennis Conner"
Lord Archer the Next Challenger from the UK?
The Fight for the Trademark
America's Cup (tm) Free Press PRESS PASS
Why Wings Aft are Better
Music: "Got a Black Magic Problem"
Cup Match to be sailed under PHRF
San Diego Protocol Scrapped!
Music: "New York, Yacht Club"
"Call me Fishmeal" (Fishmeal's home page)
From the original announcement in rec.boats.racing
Announcing the formation of the AMERICA'S CUP (tm) FREE PRESS.
that launched the AMERICA'S CUP (tm) FREE PRESS:
The AMERICA'S CUP (tm) FREE PRESS is an electronic mailing list dedicated to the limited distribution of news and information about the financial arrangements, money flow, sponsorship deals, trademarks, copyrights, and other behind-the-scenes rumors and gossip relating to the America's Cup (tm) and the various competitors, sponsors, and other business interests. Any other good scandals will also be considered fair game.
The AMERICA'S CUP (tm) FREE PRESS will also solicit artistic contributions in the form of songs, poetry, and stories that deal with these issues.
Our not-so-secret agenda is to return the America's Cup (tm) trademark and the image of the cup back to the public domain. This trademark and image are currently owned by "America's Cup Properties Inc." We also advocate that all copyright claims be dropped from all text material appearing on the America's Cup (tm) World Wide Web site, http://www.ac95.org.
Our sharpest weapon is satire. Satire and an extensive network of co-conspirators. But our motives are pure - we are doing this for "The Good of the Cup" (tm).
If you would like to join the email list and thereby subscribe and contribute to the AMERICA'S CUP (tm) FREE PRESS, send email to fishmeal@sonic.net.
All articles received or distributed under the heading "AMERICA'S CUP (tm) FREE PRESS" or via the associated email distribution list are private email unless otherwise noted. The author of each article or email item will retain full rights to control subsequent use of their material.
Why "America's Cup" is Not a Legal Trademark
by dre@ember.eng.sun.com (David Emberson)
Date: Tue, 7 Feb 1995 12:05:20 +0800
I don't know what the hell you're talking about, but count me in!
Here's my contribution:
Why "America's Cup" is Not a Legal Trademark
A trademark is a name or symbol used to identify a product
legally restricted to the use of the owner. A U.S. trademark is
granted to the applicant by the federal government if the
trademark is not a generic term or a common name or symbol that
is in the public domain. In practice, when it comes to areas
where the trademark office has no expertise, such as sailing,
approval of a trademark is usually perfunctory with any
subsequent battles left to the courts. If an owner of a trademark
does not protect its trademark and the trademark falls into
general, common usage then the owner forfeits the exclusive
license to its trademark. Xerox Corp. rabidly protects its
"Xerox" trademark by objecting vigorously at every turn when the
word "xerox" is used generically. Intel was denied the trademark
"486" since that is a common number. So it chose to rename the
586 "Pentium," a name which it could trademark.
Who "owns" the America's Cup? The owners of the winning
yacht America were given the Cup in 1851 by Queen Victoria. They
essentially created a trust in the form of the Deed of Gift. The
New York Yacht Club was the original trustee. The Perth Yacht
Club became the trustee in 1983, and the San Diego Yacht Club
became the trustee in 1987. The San Diego Yacht Club elected to
finance the formidable job of running the new Big Business/Big
Bucks America's Cup (tm) regatta by creating the America's Cup
Organizing Committee. Local skirmishes between SDYC and the Stars
and Stripes syndicate over who was really in charge of the Cup
caused a delay in announcing the 1990 defense. This allowed
Michael Fay to present SDYC with its perfectly legal New Zealand
Challenge of 1988. The Auld Mug (Hah! Did they try to trademark
that one yet?) has been the hostage of lawyers ever since.
Somehow, we now have America's Cup Properties, Inc. claiming
exclusive rights to the image of the Hundred Guineas Cup and the
name "America's Cup."
As corinthian sailors, we must Take Back Our Cup (tm), the Cup
that belongs to all of sailing. Unlike, say, the Stanley Cup,
which belongs to a for-profit corporate enterprise (the National
Hockey League), the America's Cup belongs to a trust that for 136
years did nothing to protect the image of the Cup or its commonly
used name as trademarks. The trust was created to promote
corinthian sailing between nations. The fact that the trustee has
changed does not mean that the owner, the trust, can now claim
trademark status for these symbols. These symbols are now in the
public domain due to the fact that the previous trustees did not
view their regatta as a vehicle for advertisers, T-shirt salesmen
and tourism. Sorry, America's Cup Properties, Incorporated. I
guess you will have to go back to running the race committee.
Take Back Our Cup (tm) is a trademark of the America's Cup(tm)
Free Press
Oh, they built the One-Australia
Well, the skipper said: "Me buckos,"
They spent twenty million dollars,
You can't blame the Race Committee,
Now, they tell this tragic story
From the AMERICA'S CUP (tm) FREE PRESS.
Even before the America was launched there was a dispute over
money. The builder's price was $30,000 in sail-away condition,
but the buyer (John C. Stevens) had the option to back out if the
America did not prove to be the fastest machine afloat after 20
days of trial. Other histories present the letter proposing these
purchase terms at face value, under the builder's name. But the
Lawsuit History accurately points out that the contract was
most likely ghost-written by Stevens, and the yard, being very
short on work, had almost no option but to accept. When the
project lagged several weeks behind Stevens' tight schedule - and
when a local sloop proved vastly superior in light air (a set-up
to get the price down?) Stevens offered to buy the boat for 20K,
as a done deal. In any event it certainly appears that Commodore
Stevens got the better of the boatyard, probably for the first
and last time in recorded history. Yard managers continue to take
their revenge on racing yacht owners, 164 years later.
The controversies surrounding the America from the moment its
anchor first touched English mud to the moment that Stevens
boarded the homeward bound steamer, cup in hand, are well
documented. There's the outrageous 10,000 guinea wager offer, the
short-cut inside the Nab lighthouse that was ruled legal, the
exception to the rule against preventer tackle, and the strangely
low selling price (5,000 pounds) for the yacht after the race.
The America's Cup (tm) saw the inside of a real courthouse for
the first time in 1857, with the creation of the Deed of Gift.
This document was the basis for rejecting Ashbury's first
challenge in 1869, and for setting the one-against-the-fleet
terms of the accepted 1870 contest. The 1871 re-match was
characterized by bitter disputes over conditions of the race and
other protests. Having lost four out of five races in a best-of-
seven, the challenger sailed the last two races unopposed and
claimed victory. Ashbury vowed that "if he ever came in quest of
the cup again he would bring his legal advisors with him."
The 1876 and 1881 challenges from Canada were clean (if
lopsided), and ended the era of multiple defenders. The two
mismatches motivated the NYYC to return the cup to George
Schuyler, who sent it back to the club by way of the courthouse
with a new Deed of Gift.
Two more challengers from England were dispatched more-or-less
without a hitch in 1885 and 1886, but in 1887, the heat was
turned up with a challenge from Scotland. The new English tonnage
rule was more compatible with the American handicapping system,
and for the first time an element of secrecy was introduced in
the two competing defender's camps. 1887 was also the first year
in which a diver was used to report on a secret hull shape. After
the first race the challenger charged that their bottom had been
somehow molested, and the diver went into hiding. There were also
serious complaints about conditions on the race course made
unsuitable for racing due to the crowd of spectator boats, and
the NYYC had a problem with the challenger's waterline length
being greater than that stipulated in the challenge. This last
point was resolved by arbitration, and resulted in the cup once
again going back to Mr. Schuyler for yet another revision to the
Deed of Gift.
But it wasn't all from Schuyler's hand. NYYC formed a committee
to "confer" on the wording of the document, and it is noted that
"...the language of the resolution by which they were given their
authority to act unfortunately laid the club open to the charge
of assuming powers not vested in trustees by common law or by
custom, in proposing changes in an instrument defining the
conditions of their trust."
The document that was the result of this process is essentially
the same one that is in force today.
Lord Dunraven's first challenge was actually in 1889, but
challenger and defender could not agree on terms. His challenge
for 1893 was accepted, however, and he was defeated after some
close racing. Pundits on both sides of the Atlantic were critical
of the Deed of Gift, especially the provision requiring exact
pre-specification of the challenger's LWL, which Dunraven claimed
was a significant factor in his defeat (not to mention the usual
problems with spectator boats). But he was back for more in 1895,
and the result this time was a protest over measurement and
ballast that led to a formal inquest hearing a year after the
fact. This was the most acrimonious dispute yet, the infamous
" Dunraven Incident" that, according to some, nearly did in the
America's Cup (tm) as a sporting event. The messy right-of-way
protest at the start of the first race that led to partial
dismasting of the defender is all but forgotten by comparison.
Although Dunraven never received the redress he sought with his
allegations of illegal re-ballasting, there was an act of
Congress passed in 1896 that gave the Coast Guard and other
jurisdictions the authority to keep the spectator fleet clear of
the course.
1899 was the first Lipton challenge, notable for lack of serious
controversy. 1901 is the last year covered by The Lawsuit
History, and the big issue was the eligibility of the boat from
Boston. The Deed of Gift does not specifically require that the
defending yacht be owned by a member of the defending club,
although that had always been the NYYC interpretation. Lots of
front-page ink was spilled over that battle, which became moot
when the Boston boat proved uncompetitive.
If The Lawsuit History of the America's Cup demonstrates one
thing, it is that America's Cup (tm) sailors have always had far
more than their share of protesterone flowing through their
veins. To the uninitiated, this seems to be a fatal perversion of
George Schuyler's original concept for friendly international
competition. On the other hand, it was the bitter controversies
that kept the America's Cup (tm) stories on the front page of the
New York Times for more than a Century and a half. Without those
stories (and the forest of trees that must have died to make the
paper to print them on), the America's Cup (tm) might have
slipped into obscurity.
This book will add prestige to any sailor's coffee table. 400
pages, about 90 contemporary illustrations, and an impressive
cloth binder with gold cover art. It can be found in the reading
rooms of all proper yacht clubs, and is now on the list of
required reading for new members of the New York State Supreme
Court.
The exact location, water depth, andmethod of obtaining the
photos can not be reported at this time. But the general vicinity
was quickly determined by spectator boats following support
vessels to the scene, and locating the keel exactly was almost
trivial.
The keel reportedly sits upright in the middle of a ubstantial
crater in the muddy bottom. Not surprising, considering the
lightweight composite structure of the foil (presumably buoyant),
and the massive amount of lead in the keel's bulb and/or wings
(presumably not buoyant).
Why the interest in an " old" keel? Because France 2 was very
likely testing a new keel on the old boat, using the known
performance gap against their new boat as a benchmark. The French
are not believed to have the best keel technology this year, but
even so, it was apparently worth going after the photos.
(Editor's note: "Joe's Journal" was downloaded from an
unidentified URL with a text-only web browser. Joe's Journal is
"salty" in both form and content, so delete it now if you don't
want to read that sort of stuff. It's about 80 lines. Sorry I
couldn't get you the pictures that go with it.)
Note that since Joe's Journal is pulled from a web site,
presumably it's fair game for electronic re-distribution. Joe
would seem to agree.
We were far out at sea
Well the frames went crack, we were quite far back
Pedrick's socks got wet, bookies paid our bet
From the AMERICA'S CUP (tm) FREE PRESS.
ASSHOLE n. kink or hockle in a sheet or halyard that
prevents it from running freely though a fairlead
BANG THE CORNER v. to sail all the way to one side of a race
course in search of a strategic advantage
BIG SQUEEZE: n. the maneuver by which the boat in safe
leeward position, ahead and to leeward, works up into a
position to give the windward boat bad air, taking advantage
of the lifted flow in the safe leeward position
BLACKALLER n. kink or hockle in a sheet or halyard that
prevents it from running freely though a fairlead
BOWCHICK: n. female crew who works point position on
foredeck (self-referential only)
BRICK v. to tightly fold or flake a sail into a compact,
heavy, rectangular shape
BUNCHED UP: adj. pinching
CADDIE: n. mainsheet winch grinder, or in general, a mostly-
physical helper in any position on a large boat
CASPER DOUSE: n. spinnaker douse in which the sail collapses
on the foredeck, covering the crew with white sailcloth.
Popularized by Peter Isler during 1992 America's Cup
coverage.
CLIMBING OFF: v. pointing higher
FAST FORWARD: v. sailing low and fast on a beat
FLAG 'EM: v. to protest another yacht, signaled by
displaying a protest flag
FLAT STICK adj. (Kiwi) slang for maximum speed or all-out
effort, aeronautical or automotive origin
GAS n. bad air downwind of another boat
GAUGE: n. relative distance between two boats, distinct from
bearing, as in "gaining gauge, losing bearing"
HAND SAILING v. describing sailing maneuvers, usually as
part of a postmortem, by using palms of hands to represent
courses and heel angles
HAWAIIAN ROUNDING: n. A windward mark rounding in which the
boat inside or astern forces the outside or leading boat
well past the layline, towards Hawaii.
HEIGHT MODE: n. trimmed for high pointing
HIP n. windward quarter of a boat, referring to position of
competitor, as in "on our hip"
HOT IT UP v. to sail higher and faster on a running or
reaching leg
HUNT v. to maneuver towards another boat that is obligated
to keep clear, with the intent of causing a foul. The 1993
revision of the match racing rules significantly enlarges
the ability of the right-of-way yacht to use this tactic,
although it remains poorly understood by untrained
television commentators.
HYDRO n. device on Stars & Stripes for reducing speed,
alleged to resemble a large suction bailer so as not to
count as a moveable appendage
KIWI DOUSE n. Spinnaker douse similar to MEXICAN TAKEDOWN,
but with a symmetrical spinnaker. First used in 1987
America's Cup races by New Zealand crews.
KOCH BLOCK n. Running backstay or checkstay block positioned
so that it could hit the head of an inattentive member of
the afterguard when not under load. First used during the
1992 America's Cup defense.
LEFTY: n. wind shift to the left
LEVERAGE: n. transverse separation, allowing one boat to
gain or loose with respect to the other in the event of a
wind shift
LIVING: v. ability to maintain speed to windward and behind
a competitor, on the edge of bad air
MEXICAN TAKEDOWN: n. spinnaker douse in which the boat
jibes, but the spinnaker is left flying on the new windward
side, where it collapses against the jib as it is pulled
down. Used on camera by Dennis Conner during the race on
April 13, 1995, but is believed to have been coined by Buddy
Melges during the 1992 campaign. In '92 it might have
referred to a conventional floater drop and port rounding,
during which the spinnaker blows off to the southeast,
towards Mexico. See KIWI DOUSE.
NELSONS: n., pl. rudder wings, first used by designer Bruce
Nelson on Mighty Mary
POSSESSION: n. the lead position, as in "get
possession." Used by Peter Isler on 4-19-95.
PRESSURE: n. slightly increased wind speed
PROTESTERONE: n. Hormone responsible for propensity to file
protests. Until 1995 it had been believed that because women
have only vestigial protestes glands (where protesterone is
synthesized) this behavior was sex-linked. However,
researchers have now concluded that the smaller
concentration of protesterone in women has a proportionately
greater effect on their behavior.
REEL 'EM IN: v. to gradually but significantly reduce the
lead of the boat in front
REVERSE MEXICAN: n. windward spinnaker douse, followed by a
jibe. Different from a conventional floater drop because
it's done on a hot reaching angle, and with an assym there's
no need to trip the pole early. Called for and executed by
Mighty Mary at first leeward mark on 95-04-26.
RIGHTY: n. wind shift to the right
RUNWAY n. distance to layline, mark, or starting line, used
in situations where room will be needed for acceleration.
Used by T. Whiddon on Stars & Stripes, 95-04-26.
SEWER n. the below-decks space on a large racing yacht with
minimal accommodations
SHRIMPING: v. using the spinnaker in a manner reminiscent of
a trawl net, as when trawling for shrimp. Often performed
for a shrt time during a spinnaker douse.
SIT ON THEIR FACE v. to closely cover a competitor, matching
them tack-for-tack and keeping them in bad air
SLAM-DUNK n. the act of tacking on another boat's wind in
sufficiently close proximity to prevent the other boat from
tacking away. First popularized by Jim Kelly and Gary Jobson
during 1987 America's Cup coverage, in their attempt to make
sailing tactics comprehensible to American viewers. Usage in
Australia dates to 1983 America's Cup coverage or earlier,
however.
SMALL BITES: n. pl. small oscillatory course changes
resulting in distance and position gained to windward
relative to another boat
STING: n. Local gust of wind in light conditions. Used
several times aboard Stars & Stripes on 95-04-26.
STRETCH DRIVE: n. First used on television by Jim Kelly on
4-15-95. The meaning of this term in the context of sailboat
racing is not fully understood.
TRIM UP: v. (Kiwi) sheet in
VANITY JIBE n. an unnecessary jibe done for the purpose of
passing close to yacht club, committee boat, or spectators
WALL: n. The layline. "If you jibe early you don't have a
wall to work up against." T. Whiddon, 95-04-26.
From the AMERICA'S CUP (tm) FREE PRESS.
This article may be distributed freely with attribution.
To subscribe to the AMERICA'S CUP (tm) FREE PRESS email
fishmeal@sonic.net
http://www.well.com/user/pk/ACtmFP.html
If the boat breaks badly enough to cause a serious leak - which
appears to be what happened - then the keel itself should be
largely undamaged. If the keel breaks, there's really no way it
can do enough damage to the boat to cause such a serious leak.
"It all comes down to semantics," our source says. "
What's the keel, and what's the boat?"
What's going on with these rudder wings?
The idea of rudder wings is not new. Gary Mull, designer of the
forward-rudder 12-meter USA knew all about them as far back as
'87. But how they work and what they do is not at all obvious. If
you want to improve the lift/drag ratio of the rudder, the most
effective change is to increase the rudder's aspect ratio, making
the blade deeper but shorter in chord length. So why add wings if
the rudder isn't already at maximum allowable draft?
One important function of rudder wings could be pitch damping:
the wing on the windward side makes a kind of horizontal
stabilizer, suppressing pitch motions. Remember Elvestrom's
12-meters and 6-meters with bulbous bows? He has reported that
the real advantage, when all was said and done, was from pitch
damping in waves, rather than from smooth-water resistance
reduction.
The other phenomena with keel and rudder wings that's poorly
understood is their effect on resistance in oscillating flow -
that is, in waves. Enter Dr. Kutzmeyer, an aerodynamicist at Cal
Tech who, many years ago, was getting some strange data from wind
tunnel tests of a 2-D foil model. For some reason the instruments
were showing negative drag! On careful investigation, it was
determined that there was a faulty baffle in the wind tunnel, and
even though the average flow direction was straight on, there
were oscillations in the flow so at any given instant there was
an up or down angle. When this angle exceeded the angle made by
the arc-tangent of drag/lift - the so-called "drag angle" - then
the forward component of the inclined-forward lift vector was
greater than the drag vector. For this to work, it had to be a
very efficient foil model with lots of lift and very little drag.
But the result was a net force *into* the average flow. Hence the
"kutsmeyer effect" - negative drag coefficient (thrust) on very
efficient foils in certain kinds of oscillating or irregular flow
fields.
What does this mean for America's Cup (tm) boats? The lift/drag
ratio of keel and rudder wings is on the order of 25:1 or better.
If there's enough heaving and pitching, the wings might actually
pull forward! So while the pundits seem to think that the wings
only help upwind, the reality might be that wings can help turn
wave energy into propulsion, on a run or any other point of sail.
The wave conditions in San Diego have been much more severe than
the climatological average, and this explains some of the frantic
re-designs to optimize for these new conditions.
Not only that, compliant materials in the rudder wings might even
allow a kind of "swim fin" effect. What do you think this press
release excerpt from Cray could be talking about, now that
"riblets" are illegal?
It's also reported, BTW, that Cray's contribution to PACT'95 is
worth over two million dollars in hardware and computer time.
Our usual source "deep within the research community" has some
additional comments on wings and waves, to appear in the next
issue.
If we expect to influence their policy with respect to these
trademarks, now is the time. We need email contacts within the
Team New Zealand organization, and especially within the RNZYS.
We don't expect the Kiwis to suffer from the same degree of
rectal-cranial inversion that plagued the San Digo guardians of
the cup. Kiwi trusteeship should be a major breath of fresh air.
But still, a buck is a buck, and the yacht club organizers may
find themselves operating with essentially the same motives and
constraints as the San Diego crowd.
Here's where our lobbying efforts need to cut in: It's been clear
that private ownership of the words "America's Cup' (tm) can do
far more harm than good, from a public relations point of view.
Same with the trademarks of the image of the Cup. This is not a
situation where "brand recognition" and "confusion with
competing
events" can be a problem (and if it is there are other ways of
dealing with those issues). We need to apply pressure to the
RNZYS, in the form of common-sense persuasion.
RNZYS needs to know that:
1) We know who owns the trademarks and how this ownership
can be abused.
Note that this does not necessarily mean that we oppose the City
of Aukland or the RNZYS making a ton of money out of the deal, or
that we oppose the use of other trademarked logos (like the AC95
logo) or that we oppose other aspects of commercialization. It's
safe to assume, in fact, that we all have widely divergent
opinions on these issues. What we do agree on, along with 99.65%
of sailors worldwide, is that the words "America's Cup"
(tm) should not be trademarked.
It's better if we can begin our lobbying efforts before the end
of the Cup match. TNZ and the RNZYS should commit to returning
the America's Cup (tm) trademarks to the public domain now! So,
if anyone has an email contact for any TNZ team member, any
member of the RNZYS, or anyther person closely related to the
soon-to-be trustee of the America's Cup (tm), pass it along to
the Free Press and we will initiate some serious electronic
lobbying efforts.
Don't be hearded around like just another tourist! Go on
assignment for the America's Cup (tm) Free Press!
Clip the OFFICIAL AC(tm)FP PRESS PASS below, after filling in
your userid and the date. It's real! It's valid! It will get you
into the pre-race interviews, the post-race press conferences,
the VIP press hospitality suites, and aboard the best spectator
boats. (Don't forget to file your stories.)
Part of it is the same reason that foils with swept tips have a
slight advantage. In three dimensions, the vortex sheet
"coalesces" into vortex tubes as it moves aft, and more energy
can be recovered from it there. This is especially true where
there's a discontinuity in the span loading, such as in the
transition from the wide, heavily-loaded keel foil to the more
lightly-loaded wings.
But this is still a very small effect. The larger number is
likely to be from change in balance. As the boat heels, the wings
pick up proportionately more of the side frce. Placing the wings
aft means that the total side force moves aft as the heel angle
increases, which is just what you want to do to compensate for
increased weather helm caused by the thrust from the sails moving
to leeward.
Then there's an advantage in waves. The wings aft are more
effective in damping out pitch motion, and might even generate
some "Kotzmeyer effect" thrust as described in the last issue, in
the discussion of the workings of the "Nelsons"
(rudder wings).
There also may be a desirable interaction with the wave pattern
generated by the hull and the wave effects from the wings. A
well-placed source at an very active research facility tells us
that TNZ decided on the keel and wing configuration before
working on the hull shape, and that's what led them to the aft
center of gravity and aft keel/wing location.
Concurrently, the Southern California PHRF Committee announced
that it had determined PHRF ratings for both Young America and
BlackMagic. Although the actual ratings were not disclosed, it
was announced that Black Magic rates 12 seconds/mile faster than
Young America.
Signed by Peter B. Hay, commodore of the RNZYS, and Robert James,
vice commodore of the NYYC, the new agreement returns to the
practice of charging the first accpeted challenger (the
"Challenger of Record") with the task of conducting the challeger
elimination trials and representing all challengers in further
negotiations with the defender. Also gone is the Challenger of
Record Committee.
The new protocal replaces the Trustee's Committee with the
"America's Cup Arbitration Panel," which will consist of five
members: Two from RNZYS and two from NYYC, with a fifth selected by the
first four.
The change effectlvely freezes out both Perth and San Diego,
who would have been equal members on the Trustee's Committee with
RNZYA under the '92 rules. Also frozen out is Dennis Conner's
"American Yacht Club." It doesn't meet the new
requirement that challenging clubs be in existance for five years
and have at least 200 members.
How can they arbitrarily change the rules like this? What about
the Deed of Gift?
No problem, the Deed says they have to accept a challenge from
*one* foreign yacht club. Once that challenge is accepted there's
nothing to prevent challenger and defender from writing
volumes of "mutual agreements" (aka the "protocols")
that will govern the event. So RNZYS was able to choose which club's
challenge to pull out of their pocket first, based no doubt on lengthy
back-room negotiations during the days and weeks previous to the
final race.
From: " David R. Emberson"
To: fishmeal@sonic.net
Subject: AMERICA's CUP (not a legal tm) FREE PRESS
Anything to make a little mischief... :-)THEY BUILT THE ONE-AUSTRALIA
(to the tune of "THEY BUILT THE SHIP TITANIC")
To sail the ocean blue.
And they thought that they had built a yacht
The water couldn't go through.
Well, the calc's were by some bum
(Must have used a Pentium)
It was sad, when the frail yacht went down.
"We cannot be afraid."
"The wind is over fifteen knots,"
"But the sandwiches are made."
Then they hit that two-foot chop
And the keel just would not stop.
It was sad, when the frail yacht went down.
To bring the Cup to Oz.
And whenever people asked them why
They could only say "because."
Now the crew must taste defeat,
Their boat's down twelve hundred feet.
It was sad, when the frail yacht went down.
They only did what's right.
A wind that only blows force five
Should not be such a fright.
If your hull is paper thin,
No-one says you have to win.
It was sad, when the frail yacht went down.
In yacht clubs 'round the world.
'Bout how the fearless Aussie crew
Could not sail like the girls.
While the Sheilas beat DC,
They were sinking on TV.
It was sad, when the frail yacht went down.
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AMERICA'S CUP (tm) FREE PRESS APPLICATION FOR MEMBERSHIP
(Only required for people who are professionally involved with
America's Cup (tm) promotion, reporting, and sponsorship)
NAME:________________ LOGIN________________
Years sailing:__________
Years racing:__________
How many times have you performed a 720 as skipper?__________
How many protests haveyou filed?__________
How many protests have you won?__________
Have you ever appealed a protest decision?__________
Do you have a law degree?__________
Years with internet access__________
Years reading rec.boats__________
How many hours/day do you read rec.boats.racing?__________
How many times have you been flamed?__________
Favorite computer game____________________
Have you ever had sex while wrapped in a spinnaker?
a) In forepeak during the party after the race__________
b) During a race__________
c) While serving on Race Committee.__________
How often do you get seasick?__________
a) All the time
b) Only in the ocean
c) Only at the top of the mast
d) Never! (well, hardly ever)
What is your best seasickness performance in each category?
(scale of 1-10)
a) Distance__________
b) Accuracy__________
c) Color__________
d) Sound Effects__________
Which of the following is a valid excuse for missing a
race?__________
a) Good party/bad hangover
b) The dog ate my race schedule
c) I was invited to race on a faster boat
Identify the quote:
a) " There's no bilge pump like a bucket in the hands of a
frightened man" ________________________
b) " God liked people in sailboats much better than he liked
people in motorboats" ____________________
c) " The press is the natural enemy of government"
____________________
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board of directors?__________
If yes, please explain:_______________________________________
How many books about the America's Cup (tm) do you own?__________
What is the publication date of the oldest one?__________
ESSAY QUESTION - 100-200 words:
What is the difference between journalism and promotion?
Book Review: The Lawsuit History Of The America's Cup
This magnificent old volume was privately published in 1902, and
it is far and away the most comprehensive history of the first 50
litigious years of America's Cup (tm) racing. It's rare and
expensive, and I was fortunate to be able to purchase a copy
recently with insurance money received after the dismasting of my
own yacht.
MUSIC: I AM THE SKIPPER OF THE STARS AND STRIPES
Ever since distributing " Oh, They Built the oneAustralia,"
there's been sentiment for equal treatment of the other side.
Here, then, is my submission...
" I am the Skipper of the Stars and Stripes"
(to the tune of " I am the Captain of the Pinafore" )
by Gilbert, Sullivan, and Fishmeal
(indented lines are sung by the crew)
I am the skipper of the Stars and Stripes
And a right good skipper, too.
My starts are very good,
And be it understood
I command a right good crew.
His starts are very good,
and be it understood
He commands a right good crew.
I'm never known to fail
When defending yachting's grail,
And I never never break my cover.
What never?
No never!
What never?
Well - hardly ever!
He hardly ever breaks his cover!
So give three hours of media hype
To the fearless skipper of the Stars and Stripes.
Give three hours of media hype
To the skipper of the Stars and Stripes!
I am the skipper of the Stars and Stripes,
And a right good skipper, too.
I'll call the ladies queer
When the pess is standing near,
Though we know it isn't true.
He'll call the ladies queer
When the press is standing near,
Though he knows it isn't true.
I'm never on the take
When there's sponsorship at stake,
And I never lose selection trials.
What never?
No never!
What never?
Well, hardly ever!
He hardly ever loses trials!
So give three weeks of media hype
To the fearless skipper of the Stars and Stripes.
Give three weeks of media hype
To the skipper of the Stars and Stripes!
I am the skipper of the Stars and Stripes,
And a right good skipper, too.
The Kiwis fell lke that [snap fingers]
When I sailed a faster cat,
(I can read the Dead of Gift, too)
The Kiwis fell like that
When he sailed a faster cat,
(He can read the Dead of Gift, too)
When you've got the best machine
You can win and it looks clean.
And I'll never ever lose that cup!
What never?
No never!
What never?
Well, hardly ever!
He'll hardly ever lose that cup!
So give three months of media hype
To the fearless skipper of the Stars and Stripes.
Give three months of media hype
To the skipper of the Stars and Stripes!
I am the skipper of the Stars and Stripes,
And a right good skipper, too.
We went out in a full gale,
Stayed afloat (but couldn't sail)
When the wind hit twenty-two.
We went out in a full gale,
Stayed afloat but couldn't sail
When the wind hit twenty-two.
I am the best there is
In the A-Cup sailing biz,
And I'll never drink New Zealand beer.
What never?
No never!
What never?
Well, hardly ever!
He'll hardly ever drink that beer!
So give three years of media hype
To the fearless skipper of the Stars and Stripes.
Give three years of media hyyyyyyyyyype
To the skipper of the Stars and Stripes!
From the AMERICA'S CUP (tm) FREE PRESS.
This article may be distributed freely with attribution.
To subscribe to the AMERICA'S CUP (tm) FREE PRESS email
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KEEL FROM FRANCE 2 PHOTOGRAPHED
The AMERICA'S CUP (tm) FREE PRESS has learned that the keel of
France 2, the second-string boat in the French challenge, has
been located and photographed. It's not known which syndicate
found the keel first, but it was reportedly "one of the easiest
jobs we've ever done," according to one of the technicians
involved. "We saw everything we needed to see before the French
salvage operation had barely gotten started."MUSIC: "SAIL A RACE ON THE WILD SIDE"
(to the tune of "Take a Walk on the Wild Side")
David was from San Diego CA
Thought he'd sail for A-cubed for a day
Changed the crew list, borrowed a shirt
Called the shots (the guy's such a flirt)
They said "hey Dave, sail a race on the wild side..."
They said "hey Dave, sail a race on the wild side..."
They said "hey Dave, sail a race on the wild side..."
All the race committee go:
Do do-do do-do do-do-do-do do do-do do-do do-do-do-do
Do do-do do-do do-do-do-do do do-do do-do do-do-do-do
Dave was certain he could win the race
But Mighty Mary still finished second place
Reporters all said " Oh my lord!"
" One of that crew has a centerboard!"
They said "hey Dave, sail a race on the wild side..."
They said "hey Dave, sail a race on the wild side..."
They said "hey Dave, sail a race on the wild side..."
All the sponsors go:
Do do-do do-do do-do-do-do do do-do do-do do-do-do-do
Do do-do do-do do-do-do-do do do-do do-do do-do-do-do
Tacticians are supposed to be real smart
But Dave could barely get an even start
Had his chance to give the boat a whirl
Threw the race (but he throws like a girl)
They said "hey Dave, sail a race on the wild side..."
They said "hey Dave, sail a race on the wild side..."
They said "hey Dave, sail a race on the wild side..."
All the sailmakers go:
Do do-do do-do do-do-do-do do do-do do-do do-do-do-do
Do do-do do-do do-do-do-do do do-do do-do do-do-do-do
They say the women asked to race that way
Only a man could ever save the day
What were they thinking? Where was their head?
Bill himself should have steered instead!
They said "hey Dave, sail a race on the wild side..."
They said "hey Dave, sail a race on the wild side..."
They said "hey Dave, sail a race on the wild side..."
Dennis Conner goes:
Do do-do do-do do-do-do-do do do-do do-do do-do-do-do
Do do-do do-do do-do-do-do do do-do do-do do-do-do-do
From the AMERICA'S CUP (tm) FREE PRESS.
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Well goddam fucking sonofabitch, of all the people to run
into at the party thrown by Bruno, I never woulda guessed to
cross tacks with Di. The old girl has aged a bit since '92,
but still a respectable piece o' transom, if you know what I
mean and I think you do.
[IMAGE]
Photo: Old Di ain't what she used to be, 'specially not from
this angle.
She's still as tough as ever to bag, if my pals at Miramar
are to be believed. The story is that one of the fighter
jocks was showing her what it's like to sit inside an A-6.
That's the one with the side-by-side seating, and that was
no coincidence. So they're in the cockpit, and as soon he
made his move to first base she reaches over and pulls the
goddam fucking ejection seat for his chair. For *first
base*, fer cryin' out loud. Too bad for him that his side of
the canopy didn't open properly. Anyway my other buddies at
the air station say that these A-Cup parties are more fun
than the Tailhook Convention back in the good old days.
Fuck, that's what I'm down here for.
[IMAGE]
Photo: That's a former U.S. Navy fighter pilot inside that
helmet - *completely* inside that helmet.
The San Diego waterfront is awash with groupies and gold-
diggers. Easy pickins, too: All the sailors are *way* too
fucking tired to keep their faces out of their goddam
spaghetti plates after their second drink. And they have to
sneak those goddam drinks too, because the wussie coaches
are trying like fuck to keep them straight. Meanwhile the
old farts with money go to bed at 8:30, and that leaves a
Certified British Shitload of wives, girlfriends, and great
aunties with nothin' to do. Oh yeah, and the odd bitch
columnist, too, which brings us back to Di.
[IMAGE]
Photo: Australian grinder face-down in plate of spaghetti.
Seems that early in the '92 campaign I actually got drunk
enough one night to go after her. Fuck, what a night. Ended
up doing it *inside* the keel shrouds of the New Zealand
boat, right on top of that 40,000 lb piece of lead. Shit, it
was the only place I figured no-one would be able to bother
us. But that piece of lead was cold! Almost as cold a piece
as Di, in fact. So next day, I wrote her phone number in the
bathroom at Bula's, sort of down low so's you wouldn't see
it unless you were puking into the john, and sure enough we
didn't see much of Di after that.
[IMAGE]
Photo: Here's where we did it. And by the way that's the '92
version of the top secret keel.
Shit, that reminds me, something about those damn keels: A
buddy of mine drives the heavy equipment over at DC's digs,
and he moves those fuckers around. Can't see fuck-all, they
make sure of that, the way the big guys are wrapped up. But
he knows how many keels there are, and where they store 'em.
Weird thing is, day after the Stars and Stripes keel almost
dropped, he says he counted one extra keel in the yard. And
he didn't drive it in, which he says is flat-out im-fucking-
possible. I'll get some more beers into him later this week,
and see how much more he knows.
Anyway, I gotta go. Have to drive a big piece-o'-shit
spectator boat tomorrow. if you're one of my passengers (and
if you have big tits) be sure to come up to the pilothouse
for a gam. We got an autopilot, and those fucking sailboats
can keep out of my way for a change.
'Till next time, Joe says: "There's nothing as over-rated as
bad fuck, and nothing as under-rated as a good shit."
Copyright? Fuck copyright.
Okay, you can uncover your eyes now. Hopefully we'll be seeing
more of Joe's Journal - delivered in a plain brown ASCII wrapper.MUSIC: "When I Saw that Water There"
Well it only blew 13
by an anonymous contributor
(to the tune of "I Saw her Standing There")
You know what I mean
But the loads exceeded strength by just a hair
Now I'll swap my keel for another, OOOO!
When I saw that water there
And I, I could see
That before too long, we'd be underwater
Now I'll swap my keel for another, OOOO!
When I saw those bulkheads tear
Never saw the finish line
That pump sure saved the day
We primed it with Perrier
And before too long, we were just spectators.
Now I'll swap my keel for another, OOOO!
Though they claim it isn't fair
Good thing were were far behind
The boat was leaking fast
Couldn't even finish last
And before too long, A-cubed was protesting
Cause I swapped my keel for another, OOOO!
Since I saw that water there
Since I saw that water there
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http://www.well.com/www/pk/ACtmFP.htmlLost French Keel Lost Again!
Meanwhile, oceanographic researchers, moonlighting for an un-
named syndicate, went back to get some more photos of the keel
that fell off France 2. However, they were not successful in
locating the keel this time. "We're completely mystified,"
reported one of the technicians. "We found the impact crater, but
the keel was gone!" Oceanographers are now trying to identify a
natural phenomenon that could move a keel of those proportions
out of range of the cameras and sonar of the researchers. Because
underwater photography of keels, lost or found, is clearly in
violation of item 13-F of the "Mutual Consent Items" that deal
with security and reconnaissance, the project necessarily takes a
low profile.AMERICA'S CUP (tm) JARGON WATCH
The language of sailing is a living language if there ever was
one, and usage changes every season. This is a sample of some of
the jargon believed to be in current use by top-level sailboat
racers. If you have corrections, additions, or etymological
treatises on any current jargon, the America's Cup (tm) Free
Press is interested in your contributions to this feature for
future issues.
ACCORDION: 1. n. the paths of two boats that are alternately
getting lifts/headers, or 2. n. a temporary gain or loss
relative to another boat on the same tack; "this is an
accordion for us" or 3. v. the act of sailing that kind of
course. Used on Stars & Stripes on 95-04-26, and explained
by Jobson.DID DC'S KEEL REALLY BREAK?
Heads rolled in the Team Dennis Conner camp when they realized
they had missed an important trick: They were the only syndicate
that didn't think to sell off the *very* high-valued real estate
on the Stars 'n Stripes keel to advertisers. In the midst of the
turmoil and internal finger-pointing, one disenchanted TDC team
member confirmed something that the AMERICA'S CUP (tm) FREE PRESS
has suspected for some time: It's pretty much impossible to break
the boat *and* the keel simultaneously.TECHNICAL NOTES: RUDDER WINGS - WHAT'S GOING ON?
Young America employs revolutionary new materials that
assist in reducing drag on the sailing craft and improving
lift -- ultimately increasing the boat's speed. Through
simulation on Cray supercomputers, PACT 95 designers were
able to better understand the effect of the new material to
improve flow direction and ease the flow around the hull.
Wave energy extraction could explain the Cray press release,
which suddenly makes sense if you think of these compliant
materials being used in rudder wings. Or, as the anonymous source
of the press release suggests, "simply disinformation."MUSIC: "Sixteen Crew"
by an anonymous contributor
(To the tune of "Sixteen Tons" by Merle Travis)
Some people say a cup boat's not made to last
A cup boat's made outa resin and glass
Resin and glass and carbon and lead
They shoulda used steel, we got kevlar instead
It takes sixteen crew, and what do you get?
Another race lost, and the program's in debt
Kevin donchya beat me 'cause I gotta win
I owe my soul to ESPN
We went out one mornin' when the sun didn't shine
Used the new sails, but were late for the line
Needed more money but the sponsor said no
Had to buy our shirts at the souvenir store *
It takes sixteen crew, and what do you get?
Defense Committee ain't decided yet
Russel donchya beat me 'cause I gotta win
I owe my soul to ESPN.
My first time sailing was in drizzling rain
Rulebook and protest are my middle name
Crewed for a judge and a sea-lawyer too
Ain't no way they're gonna green flag you **
It takes sixteen crew, and what do you get?
Grind all day and your pants get wet
Leslie donchya beat me 'cause I gotta win
I owe my soul to ESPN.
If you see me comin' better steer aside
'Cause if you don't, then we're gonna collide
One tack is starboard, *** the other is port ****
If you don't keep clear, I'll see you in court
It takes sixteen crew, and what do you get?
Defense Committee ain't decided yet
Dennis donchya beat me 'cause I gotta win
I owe my soul to ESPN
I owe my soooouuuuuul..... to ESPN
* pronounced "stow" for you Aussies and Kiwis
** point at audience
*** show fist
**** show other fist
From the AMERICA'S CUP (tm) FREE PRESS.
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JOE'S JOURNAL #2
JOE's JOURNAL
Fuckin'-A! Turns out that Di has a daughter! Di musta been
one of those chicks who dropped out around the middle of
senior year and then didn't come to the first couple of
reunions. And I always figured, with her rich-ass family and
all, she woulda been able to do the quickie "vacation" to
Puerto Rico just before it started to show. But here's
living proof!.
[IMAGE]
Photo: DI's daughter. You poor fuckers still using Lynx can
eat your hearts out.
Anyway, that kid's dad musta been some sweet and sexy piece
of work, because she sure didn't get what she's got from her
mom. I mean, fuck, like a freight train on steroids! If I
was wearing my offshore harness I woulda fucking clipped on.
Holy fuck-shit, we were bouncing around like an E-scow in an
ebb tide. I was starting to have flashbacks to Fastnet '79.
But I digress...
The mood's been too fucking serious around the San Diego
waterfront, IMHFO. Make that waterfronts, because the
different syndicates are spread out all over creation. Shit,
even I had to resort to pushing debutantes into swimming
pools for entertainment. That, and giving technical adice
on how to properly de-pants an Australian. Good thing Di Jr.
showed up to ratchet up the action a few clicks.
[IMAGE]
Photo: Debutante in absurdly expensive evening gown climbing
out of swimming pool.
Meanwhile, while Di Jr. is fucking everyone's brains out,
Di herself must be getting bored to shit.
All she can do is fucking name-drop. Fuck, I've had rolls
in the hay that I'm proud of too, but I don't go blabbing
about them on the fucking internet. Except that time I shared a
V-berth with Lee Helm *and* her girlfriend - but shit, that
story will take more space to tell than we have here.
[IMAGE]
Photo: Lee Helm and friend. Betchya didn't know she smokes.
It's big fun, BTFW, to watch the Kiwi and Aussie crews in
the bars, now that their schedule has eased up. But those
fuckers from one-oz, you wouldn't believe how they try to
play up the sympathy act while their program circles the
drain. This one trimmer is laying it on real thick to this
hot little media PR droid, and she puts him fucking
completely a-back with this line "if you want sympathy,
you'll find it in the dictionary between shit and syphilis."
A woman after my own heart, had me LOFL. Musta cost him at
least three boatlengths, if you know what I mean and I think
you do. But shit, they left together anyway.
Speaking of 'Strai'ans, BTFW, did you know that Kraft makes
and sells Vegemite down there? Sorta the vegetable version
of Spam, if you're lucky enough to never have seen or tasted
the shit. YMMFV, but they seem to like it. Explains a few
things, no? OTOFH, they suck up that Mt. whateveritis rum
like centrifugal bilge pumps with a solid prime - there's no
accounting for taste. And that Champagne that Di says she
likes so much, even though it tastes like fucking horse piss
if you ask me. (JAFDP) They must be one of her sponsors too.
Well, that's it for now. Tomorrow I have to drive one of the
umpire boats (Why in *fuck* did they ever agree to use
Bayliners, fercrisakes?) so you might see me on TV. No
passengers allowed on the umpire boat, so if you get a
glimpse of Di Jr. in the hatch, that's just between you and
me.
Remember: "You can pick your friends, and you can pick your
nose. But you can't pick your friend's nose."
Copyright? Fuck copyright.
ps: Where can I get a subscription to "the Tittler?"
Sounds like my kinda rag.
Re-printed by the AMERICA'S CUP (tm) FREE PRESS
MUSIC: The Ballad of Dennis Conner
(to the tune of "The Ballad of Davey Crockett")
Born in a condo by the deep blue sea
Yacht club carpet has stains from his pee
Favorite toy was a code flag B
And charged at the bar, when he was only three
Dennis, Dennis Conner
They call him the Comeback Kid
Raced doublehanded 'cause he was so poor
'Till the fleet was licked, and fame was in store
But while he was handling this risky chore
He made some people angry forever more
Dennis, Dennis Conner
They call him the Comeback Kid
He went off to Newport to raise some hell
Messin' up the starts, the way he could yell
Drove every Twelve, so we hear tell,
Too bad he couldn't win with Liberty as well.
Dennis, Dennis Conner
Head in the trophy case
When he lost the Cup, his grief was tall
There were times he wanted to end it all
And sail right over a waterfall
But he answered instead, his yacht club's call
Dennis, Dennis Conner
They call him the Comeback Kid
When he come home, the Cup soundly won
The fundraising drive had just begun
He completely forgot it was 'sposed to be fun
And pasted a logo on his number one
Dennis, Dennis Conner
Grovelling for corporate bucks
His boat is fastest, and his boat is best
But he's giving the old Stars and Stripes a rest
Can another hull meet the Kiwi test?
I'll bet the Cup goes to the south and the west!
Dennis, Dennis Conner
We'll see you in Auckland soon
See you in Auckland soon....
From the AMERICA'S CUP (tm) FREE PRESS.
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Is LORD JEFFERY ARCHER planning a challenge from UK?
A.Bainbridge@uea.ac.uk (Alex Bainbridge) passes along the rumor
that "Lord Jeffery Archer - a UK author, Member of parliament and
close associate to Baroness Thatcher, has purchased land in New
Zealand on the coast somewhere next to a yacht club." One
possible explanation is simple land speculation: "When (if) TNZ
win the cup, in the next AC all the challengers will need
somewhere to put their headquarters...." But it's more likely
that something more directly aimed at the America's Cup (tm)
itself is in the works.THE FIGHT FOR THE TRADEMARK - EMAIL ADDRESSES NEEDED
In a few weeks the Royal New Zealand Yacht Squadron will, in all
probability, become the "current trustee" of the America's Cup
(tm). This means that they will also own the single share of
stock in "America's Cup (tm) Properties, Inc," the company that
owns and administers the trademark to the words "America's Cup"
(tm) and the trademark to the image of the cup itself on behalf
of the current trustee.
2) We areprepared to use all methods at our disposal:
publicity, (legal) conspiracy, print media spams, and
especially "the anarchy of the net" to insure that such
abuses are not repeated.
3) We believe that the only reasonable course of action is
to return the trademark of the words "America's Cup"
and the image of the cup to the public domain.America's Cup (tm) Free Press PRESS PASS
Going to San Diego for the final match?
_____________________________________________________
| |
| |
| |
| P R E S S P A S S |
| |
| AMERICA'S CUP (tm) FREE PRESS |
| |
| issued to:
Wings Aft!
Why are wings aft so much faster than wings forward? This is the
most visible difference between Black Magic and Young America,
and surely the slower boat can't have it right.
"I know others did their hull work before or in parallel
with wind tunnel work," says our source, "and so were using
bulbs with no wings and ended up somewhere else with respect
to hull shape, i.e. LCB further forward than TNZ."
It's also worth pointing out that TNZ uses full-span, untapered
wings, probably the most powerful wings in the series this year.
This is consistent with the design philosophy of allowing a
little more heel angle, and relying on the wings for a greater
portion of the side force.MUSIC: Black Magic Problem
(to the tune of "Black Magic Woman"
I got a Black Magic problem
I got a Black Magic problem
Yes, I got a Back magic problem
They're sailing so fast I can see
This is a Black Magic problem and they're
going to make a loser out of me.
Don't throw that tack on me, Kiwi
Don't throw that tack on me, Kiwi
No, don't throw that tack on me, Kiwi
We've spent every dime we can spend
Don't throw that tack on me, Kiwi, cause you
might just make us change the rules again
You got boat speed on me, Kiwi
You got boat speed on me, Kiwi
Yes, you got boat speed on me, Kiwi
I might as well just give it up
You're pointing so high,
magic boat I can't give you that cup...
From the AMERICA'S CUP (tm) FREE PRESS.
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REMAINING RACES TO BE SAILED UNDER PHRF
In an effort to bring more relevane to America's Cup (tm)
racing, the San Diego Yacht Club announced today that all
remaining races of the current Cup series will be sailed under
PHRF handicaps. Speaking on behalf of the America's Cup (tm)
Trustee's Committee in a pre-dawn press conference, the SDYC
spokesperson explained that "since the vast majority of racing in
the U.S. now takes place under PHRF or similar performance-based
handicap systems, it's only appropriate that the America's Cup
(tm) reflect this national preference."SAN DIEGO PROTOCOL IS SCRAPPED!
And with it the Trustees Committee, final arbitor of defender-
challenger disputes for the '92 and '95 matches.MUSIC: New York, Yacht Club
(to the tune of "New York, New York")
Start spreadin' the news
We're not gonna lose
This time we've challenged from.....New York, Yacht Club!
We get to.....make the rules
New Yorkers.....are no fools
It's up to us, New York, Yacht Club!
They're sad as can be
At SDYC
They lost it big and now we're going to change the game
In their old.....trophy case
You'll just see.....DC's face
It's our turn now, New York, Yacht Club!
On 44th Street
The talk has been sweet
We really put one over on those kiwi hicks
Is that a.....rat you smell?
We've got a.....bridge to sell
But you can trust, New York, Yacht Club!
That old model room
Saw twelve years of gloom
There's just one empty shelf we need to brighten up
It should be.....bolted there
If it's bolted.....anywhere
It's coming home, New York, Yacht Club!
It's going to be
One more century
Before we ever let the auld mug go again
Cause that's a.....cup so nice
We'll never.....lose it twice
It's up to us, New York, Yacht Club!
From the AMERICA'S CUP (tm) FREE PRESS.
This article may be distributed freely with attribution.
To subscribe to the AMERICA'S CUP (tm) FREE PRESS email
fishmeal@sonic.net
http://www.well.com/user/pk/ACtmFP.html
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