Inkwell: Authors and Artists

    
Ladies and Gentlemen, we are about to be given what we have been
asking for these last ... two years now? (longer for some)...
new...
original...
stories by Martha Soukup.

ooooh yeah, baby.
  

    

This calls for a party!
  

    
Sounds like an excellent idea to me. Here, you tie these balloons to
that giraffe, and I'll fill these ice tubs with assorted beverages and
brightly-colored machine tools.
  

    
I'll bring the Pirate's Booty!

Mmmmm.
  

    
Can we grill the Pirate's Booty with the chocolate schoolboys?
  

    

from HOLLEY NOWELL:



Oh, yes, re my earlier message this week. Chocolate fudge. I think next
holiday when I have to cook my two specialties, I'll get the caramel drops
instead of the semi-sweet chocolate drops and see if caramel fudge would be
as good. At least it wouldn't make me itch to lick the bowl and spoons and
beaters. And to cheat and sneak a piece or two.

Catching up. They ALWAYS post neat things after I've sent off my email of the
week.

Yay Martha. Go! Rah! Go!

And Go! Rah! Go! EJ, Yay Maure as well.

And, yeah. Boxes. This is the first place that's been big enough to unpack my
books since, ok, 15 or so years ago. But now I'm having fits about where to
put all the dishes as my kitchen is tiny. I almost bought an antique
sideboard belonging to a friend of mine but discovered it's so huge it
wouldn't fit even here. Sigh. So now I'll keep an eye out for a smaller glass
cabinet for displays. So, still boxes. Office supplies (haven't painted THAT
room yet). Posters. (GOT to frame). Clothes (GOT to get rid those good suits
and other clothes that are too small. My son keeps telling me. WHEN you lose
the weight again, you DESERVE new suits. He doesn't understand how GOOD it
feels to be able to wear that special suit you paid a lot of money for way
back when again. So, I'm trying to whittle it down to just one or two.) And,
yeah, craft supplies for miscellaneous projects I haven't gotten to yet.

Got Dream Hunters and Smoke & Mirrors. Finished DH and am reading S&M. Hah!
S&M. Funny. Ahem. Good books both. Really enjoying.

Roses: I was told this weekend that my old duplex (which belongs to my pals)
the brother moved in and PAVED OVER my beautiful front yard and had his pals
DIG UP about 40 or so rose bushes. He SAID he'd thrown them away and maybe he
thinks so but my pal (the husband part) rescued them and put them in the back
of his car because he KNEW his wife (the wife part of my pals) would KILL him
if he let them do that. So I go to their house now and we walk around looking
at the poor little things waiting for them to bloom so I can tell her what
they are. One did bloom. It's a beautiful big yellow. Dang. I don't remember
putting in a yellow rose but that was two years ago. I do remember I WANTED
to put Golden Showers in 'cause it does so well in this area and I may just
have and forgot. I'm sure the Peace and Chicago Peace are both gone. They are
too frail to be suddenly yanked up and survive. Several of the minis are over
at their new place going great guns.  Red Cascade is doing well. It's as
close to a weed you can get in a rose anyway though.  I'm hoping the Maman
Cochet and Sombreuil is there somewhere. The MC was 8 feet tall and wide.
Dear me. Then there was the Souvenir St. Anne. The Mr. Lincoln. The Queen
Elizabeth. The Night Time. Sigh. A couple others I can't recall the names of
right off the top of my head. A nice little pinky pink one that is probably
Empress Josephine or Juliette or Evelyn has bloomed she said but I didn't see
it so can't decide what it was. They had such different shapes. It may have
been the Svnr. de St. Anne. I think the Evelyn may have died early on though.
It's kind of frail also. Ig. I know. It is not my place any more and he had
perfect right to turn the front yard into a parking lot. Sigh. This is why I
never drive by old places I used to have. I hate seeing the massive changes.
I once drove by my grandmother's house which used to be surrounded by roses,
day lilies and amaryllis lilies and it was BARE. They'd yanked it ALL up and
put down GRASS. Yuk.

On the elevator thingy they put a Word of the Day. Today it was "nonesuch". I
thought that word was obsolete. Something you only see in Gothic Romances
like Georgette Heyer. ?? Seems to ME. Seems to me that they should only put
new WotD made up of words people can actually use. I mean. Many times I've
used words that are still everyday - well sorta - kinds of words that I've
had to explain to our young receptionist who is tickled to learn the new one.
But they are words like 'resolution' or 'obtrusive' or 'moot' (legal office
remember) or my faves 'incomprehensible' or 'reprobate'. Not 'nonesuch'. Who
is going to use nonesuch in regular speech? Like, When it comes to
international law my two bosses are both nonesuches? Next they'll be putting
'nonpareil' up. Although, hm, cometothinkofit, if people started using these
words again. It wouldn't be a BAD thing.

4/30 Neil's journal. He is disappointed to learn Twinkies have actual food in
them. I was too. When given a list of things I couldn't eat because of
allergies I thought to myself, well, I'll get Twinkies, they haven't got
ANYthing in them pronounceable. But they have BEEF flavoring and SOYbean oil.
Both of which are on my list. Dang.

I think I'd better send this in today. It's getting long.
  

    

HOLLEY NOWELL again:

Dodge
Oh, and I'll bring the caramel schoolgirls.
  

    

I am currently loaning my Sandman's, one graphic novel at a time, to a
coworker who doesn't really like comics. He's hooked. Going through them at
about a book at a time.
  

    
NOT surprised AT all.  Neil could hook anybody.  The guy's just that
GOOD.

Dodge -- "Nonpareil" isn't obsolete.  I saw it used in an
entertainment article once (and it wasn't talking about the movie
snack).  "Incomprehensible" and "obtrusive" are too easy.

I have a set of cards containing archaic words, and explaining what
they meant and what words they gave rise to, if any.  Someday I'll tell
you guys what it says about "sendeman."
  

    
Words that People Could Really Use, If They Were Desperate Enough:

Telaphasia:  The condition of wandering aimlessly without regard to
your surroundings talking to oneself, with a phone clamped to one ear.

Post Robotic Stress Syndrome:  The feeling one gets after receiving in
excess of one hundred e-mails offering to sell you something you
wouldn't want even if it were physically possible.

Traumatic Post Stress Syndrome:  Similar to the above, but the feeling
one gets after realizing one has misspelled all the key proper names
in a very long and important post.

Post-Mortem:  An e-mail that has somehow taken more than a month to
get through the wires to your in-box, particularly an urgent such mail.

Elevacuator:  The person at the back of the crowded elevator who needs
to get off at an intermediate floor, necessitating that at least half
the other occupants leave the car.  Also "elevacuee," a person who
doesn't manage to get back on before the doors close.

Taxionomy:  What you yell at the taxi that has not only refused to
pick you up in heavy rain, but splashed you in the course of not
picking you up.

Obbligodno:  The tenth or more time you see a commercial that was
funny once, if that.
  

    
Mike- I will use these words! And please, please, please compile your
posts into a big happy book and sell it.  
  

    
*desperate rumble of distant battle, crashing things, frantic
footsteps running nearer, Pam dives for home, er the Well door,
clinging to the opening by all 10 fingernails as someone unseen tries
to drag her back out*

Working.  *gasp*  Alot.

(chanelling Tree): Maure - Hippo Birdies 'n other magics to you!

Neil: A triple crown, after all.  Jubilance!  Well-behaved travel
fairies be with you.

Martha: Local Girl makes good!  Congratulations!  Can't wait to be
able to read or see the final play.  And you wrote the lyric! 
Woohoo!!!

Mary:  Glad you had so much fun in Atlanta.  I don't blame you one bit
for not wanting to go back to school.

Michelle: *beams*  Brigid's blessings on your new joint abode.

Erynn: We've had an absolutely unprecedented number of April showers
in SoCal this year, and it's loverly.  Fires in the fireplace in April!
 Yummy!

Bill!  You posted!  You're real!  I was ever so afraid I was actually
carrying on cell phone conversations with myself...

In other news: Davey has coerced, brainwashed and tortured me with
statements like "Oh no!  Terri Windling's a teeny little thing!" into
going to WisCon in May.  So I'll be lurking behind her there and
pretending I have a clue, whilst trying not to bankrupt myself buying
Elise creations.  Hope to say hello to anybody else who'll be there.

*sound of fingernails being dragged against wood*

No!  I won't go!  I won't...!
  

    
WAIT!!!

I have to warn you all!  The deceit!  The danger!  

I have uncovered the deep, dire and occasionally leather-clad secret
at the heart of the LA-FOG scene.

Adriana is secretly Walker's alter-ego.

It's true.  Has anyone ever seen them together?  Oh sure, they were
supposedly at the AG signings on the same night.  But who actually saw
them in the same place at the same time?  Nope.  Never happened.

And ever since then, it's been one lame excuse after another.  Adriana
couldn't make it to the Coraline signing with us (and Walker) because
of a "family visit."  Then there was the play we were all supposed to
go to that they *said* they'd both go to, but never actually had to
make good on because they secretly *already knew* that it was sold out
and I wouldn't be able to get tickets.  Then Walker suddenly had to
cancel out on Disneyland and Tori because of an alleged friend's kidney
transplant.  (Did we ever actually *see* this friend?  Or her kidneys?
 Can he *prove* there was anything wrong with them?)  Now Adriana begs
off a group trip to the Matrix Reloaded because she's in a *play*. 
(But how can we know that she's actually *there*, since we'll all be in
the movie theater?  It's all entirely too convenient.)

It took me a while, but I got there eventually.

It's a plot to take over the world, it is!  They're just biding their
time until the moment is ripe and they'll appear together and create a
universal paradox, and suddenly we'll all find ourself eating Wheaties
for breakfast, driving the speed limit, and watching The Sound of Music
after work, and there'll be nothing between them and their goal of
ruling all of Neildom!

It mustn't be allowed!

Don't let it happen!

Make them actually come to something together *before* their final
fiendish plans are in place!

For the good of...

*Oof!*

us all....!

*Pam disappears from the doorway*
  

    
Many Bothans died to bring you this message.
  

    
*leans in*

Bugger... almost missed my cue...

*clears his throat, and strikes a dramatic pose*

Muahahahahahaaaaaaa--coughhackcoughcoughhack

Fear us! *cough*

Gotta quit smoking...

(And for those of you that were at World Fantasy last year, you know
how frightful a giant WalkerBunny is...)
  

    
Well, Pam, he asked me to write a lyric.  And if I say yes, which I did say,
then I'm stuck having to do it--  Which is a pretty terrifying thought when
it comes to having been asked to write a full-length play when I haven't
anything in particular I'm thinking of writing at that length.
  

    
Hi Pamela! Good to see--er--hear from--um, See your typing!
There we go. 

We had a HUGE thunderstorm today. The sky was green even. It was
wonderful. I love big storms when I can stay inside and read scary
stories to myself. 

I very nearly headed out to SF this week, just to get away. Have a
lost weekend of sorts. But with moving coming up and needing to see my
dad, it couldn't happen. One of my dearest friends moved to SF this
year to be a Graduate Art Student and become a woman. He keeps begging
us to come stay with him and his girlboyfriend. Soon...soon. I miss him
so much and I want to meet all you cali people. So many reasons to
visit! It will DEFINITELY happen this year, or I shall combust.  
  

    
Now, mind you, in Pam's note to me saying she'd finally decided to
<gasp> actually ATTEND WisCon, she /b/l/a/m/e/d/ credited Walker's sage
advice as a major influence. (The girl thinks she's going to lurk
behind me, oh, right, of course I'll let her. Bwahahahaha.) And Terri's
a changeling, plain and simple. Ask anyone.

A giant WalkerBunny is so frightful I couldn't even hold my camera
steady. No, wait, that was laughter. Although, come to think of it,
I've met Walker but have been taking everyone's word for it that
Adriana really exists. Hm.

Life as a homeowner has been really exciting this week. Tuesday
morning I had a call from the contractor's scheduler: "I know it's
short notice but all of your windows came in and the guys are available
so can I send them over to start tomorrow?" Um, well, OK, I guess
so... So yesterday morning there were trucks full of windows and
installers parking by the house at about 8:20am, and by 9:00 they were
throwing the old windows out the windows. Lots of crashing and
crunching noises but no tinkling of broken glass, whew. I spent most of
the time working elsewhere in the house (from wherever they
were)--there are some things I just don't think I'm strong enough to
watch. They finished the entire second floor and the attic dormer on
Wednesday and installed all of the first floor windows today. Tomorrow
will see the first floor finishing work and the three little basement
windows done, then they'll be gone and I'll have to vacuum everything
inside (every curtain in the house was washed this week, too. Funny
thing, that) and rake everything outside and wait for the siding to
arrive.
  

    
Pam -- You posted! And wow, did you ever! No, the cell phone
conversation was not a figment of your imagination. Some of the other
stuff might be, but not that. ;-)

Currently trying to determine if I want to make a day-trip (or
night-trip) to WisCon (or, more accurately, to the Madison area) to see
friendly faces. Hmmm. Most tempting, especially with the long weekend,
and, er, well, milestones, shall we say. And I could even add a
ballpark to my resume. Most tempting indeed.
  

    
my cover's blown!
*whisking cape over head, vanishing*
  

    
Er, I mean, MY cover's blown!

*whisks kilt over legs, vanishing*
  

    
Well, I'm sick again, bugger it all... I took a day off to rest
because I've been feeling out of it and my body decided that was it's
cue to fall apart completely.
Still, this is a much more mundane fever (waffling between normal and
100.5 but responds well to Tylenol) so I can't complain overmuch.

Of course, having a fever didn't stop me from doing the final
performance of Picasso last night, although I don't think it did me a
whole hell of a lot of good. Still, "on with the show", eh?

Anyway, It's nice to see that there are people here more obviously
insane than I am. Very comforting really.

Wombat!
  

    

I hate to see that the best you've got at the moment is "can't complain
overmuch." Feel better soon!
  

    
Feeling much better now. Rested all day, and took some cough drops
with me to see X2.
I would say more, but I'm all a tingle and don't want to give a single
glorious thing away.
*bampf*
  

    
Glad to hear you're feeling better, Dan!  And my brother tells me X2
is cool.  Who knows when I'll get to see it, though....

Last night, however, I did see Malachy McCourt in _A Couple of
Blaguards_.  That was the funniest thing I've seen in a LOOOOONG time! 
If you guys ever get a chance to see it, go -- especially if you're
Irish (and/or) Catholic!